Backpfeifengesicht*

Every once in a while when I am feeling particularly strong, I mosey on over to the Gaggle for some chuckles. Or at least I think I'll meet some chuckles. Instead, I'm mugged in the Alley of the Appalled. You'd think I'd learn about walking in there alone. After dark. With my wallet in my hand. And a $50 bill sticking out of it. You get the idea.

One particular exchange caught my jaded eye.

Press Briefing by Scott McClellan.

Q Scott, the departure of David Safavian from the Office of Management and Budget would seem to indicate that this administration has no tolerance for employees who face indictments. Is that an accurate assumption?

Heh. Squirm, worm!

MR. McCLELLAN: I appreciate your question and I think you're asking that in the context of some of the current events, and I'm not going to even jump in to try to speculate on those matters.

[Worm squirming.]

Q Given the time that Karl Rove would need to spend preparing for the testimony he delivered today and the hours that he spent at the courthouse today, how does that kind of absence and that kind of additional assignment for him affect the work that's going on here?

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, there are a lot of important priorities that we're focused on here at the White House. We are a nation at war. The President is continuing to lead the effort to win the war on terrorism. We are focused on the priorities of the American people. The White House has a lot of work going on, and we remain focused on that work.

Friends, did you ever in your life think you'd hear drivel on the order of this from a literate adult, let alone from the spokesperson for the supposed president of the United States of America? Think of it! A lot of important priorities? As opposed to unimportant priorities? We have grown too accustomed to Orwellian sloganeering and doublespeak, for sure, but what do these sentences mean?

We are a nation at war. Scotty has a marvelous grasp on the obvious. Are we supposed to be chuffed that he can point at reality and say, See?

Dumbyass is continuing to lead the effort to win the war on terrorism. So we've just given up on winning altogether, is that it? He's continuing an effort to lead. Oh goodie. We'll all sleep better tonight, knowing what an effort to lead it is for him.

We are focused on the priorities of the people. Right. And those would be what? Avarice, greed, despotism, craven disregard for human life, unparalleld croneyism? Anytime you have to assert this sort of placeholder non sequitur, the jig is up. Scottie, wave the white flag. You sound like the lying sack of horse puckey you are.

The White House has a lot of work going on, and we remain focused on that work. I mean, that last sentence is so tooth-achingly painful that it is positively Rumsfeldian. The White House has a lot of work going on, and we remain focused on that work, which is going on, and we're focusing on it as it's going on, because it's hard work, and we're focusing on it, the focusing on the focus, which is ongoing. It's hard work.

And then Scottie just goes on and lies, lies, lies some more for the duration of the Gaggle. By this time, the Press Corpse have both hands on their wallets.

[Photo credit.]

[*A face that cries out for a fist in it.]

Comments

[handdrummer]

Yep, they're working hard alright. Cause it's hard work, workin' that hard at such hard work.

[handdrummer]

Yep, they're working hard alright. Cause it's hard work, workin' that hard at such hard work.

[handdrummer]

But I repeat myself.

[ae]

handdrummer, your repetitive redundancies are music to my ears. Repeat on!